Handicapped?

My vision of handicapped individuals: someone who walks with a noticeable limp, cane, or walker; someone who is in a wheelchair or has crutches. My vision of a non- handicapped person: me; someone who walks normally, who has no support from wheelchairs,    crutches or canes; someone who "appears" to be totally healthy. I know how I look from the outside: healthy, but a tad bit overweight. But, as I have learned over the past two years- you should never judge a book by its cover. 

Cancer: no hair;Broken Bones: a cast; Past Surgeries: a scar; Allergies: runny nose.    Autoimmune diseases: invisible- like a superhero. Autoimmune diseases rob you of      energy, appetite, sleep, and the hope of a perfect day- and, in most cases, you you would not be able to tell the difference between someone who has and someone who has not. Autoimmune diseases are painfully tricky- there is not really a "test" to diagnose, your doctor has to go based on their gut feeling and ability to put 2 and 2 together. And, if you have a totally lazy burnt out doctor, you may never know; you could live day to day    thinking (and having other people think) that you are either crazy, going crazy or one step closer to the psych ward. There are days I feel like I am in all three states, that I have to remind myself to take a deep breath and step back- I am not crazy.  I have a tricky illness- lots going on: terrible pain, heart, kidney and liver issues, migraines, autonomic nerve   issues... the list could go on and on.

                    

Hopefully, my story has a happy ending. But until that time, I am the proud owner of a new handicapped tag- you know, so when I go to Target or the mall at Christmas, I can park right up front. It's the little things.